Don was the publisher of the newspaper where I once worked, and I showed up to speak at his retirement roast. In the middle of my speech I pretended to take a phone call from someone who'd had an affair with him. Don had a great sense of humor! He's gone now, but years later I still grin at the memory of that night. I had the audience in the palm of my hand. Thanks, Don.
I must add that the "someone" and the affair were my inventions. I think one of our fellow writers might remember when I was putting this speech together. Lots of fun!
You're such a prankster!
ReplyDeleteI never thought of it that way, but I guess I am. I draw the line at pulling people's chairs out from under them though.
DeleteBilly Collins and I once had a conversation about the power of making people laugh. It really is a heady feeling. I remember seeing all the guests at Don's roast—dressed up and seated at tables—leaning toward me with expressions of gleeful anticipation. Powerful! Of course, Billy Collins would know.
ReplyDeleteI am not surprised that you had the audience in the palm of your hand. You are very talented at doing that!
ReplyDeleteI have never given a "roast" speech but I imagine it is one of the most difficult to write and give. Sounds like you were very successful
ReplyDeleteI find roasts uncomfortable. It seems like there is a very fine line between funny and mean, and the ones I've seen cross it regularly. I'm sure yours was funny - I can't imagine you being mean.
ReplyDeleteNo, it wasn't mean. But it was extremely funny. I worked on it for weeks. Sitting next to the podium was a DJ from the radio station, a funny guy himself. He could read my notes as I spoke, and at times he was convulsed in laughter, his forehead on the table. He told me later that was the funniest thing he'd ever heard. All the community leaders were in the audience, and a prominent lawyer sent me a card the next day giving me his personal award for the best speech of the night. All of which sounds like tasteless bragging, I'm sure, but I've actually shown restraint. :-)
DeleteDid you keep the notes?
DeleteYes, they're on my computer somewhere. I thought you might remember the event because you knew about the speech before it happened (although what we remember and what we don't will always be a mystery). You suggested that it would have been great to have the phone call be revealed as a wrong number—after all the dialog about the affair. That would have been perfect!
DeleteReally?? I must be getting old. Now I'm going to search for the word roast in my gmail to see if I can find that conversation.
DeleteI don't even remember what year it was. (I am getting old!)
DeleteOh, this is WONderful.
ReplyDeleteThe post was perfect, but I love this long conversation even more.
ReplyDelete